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freedom back to panic

NOTE: Please so everyone knows, this was an April Fools gag. Thank you!panicbanner1

 

In the last couple of months, Jordan and the gang have really focused on growing away from our panic and freeing ourselves, but what if that freedom is not all its cracked up to be? Who’s not to say there isn’t a sort of safety in our fear?

That’s why, all this week, I will be officially hosting “Freedom Back to Panic” week. “Freedom Back to Panic” week serves as an opportunity for people to spiritually regress without feeling all that bad about it.

Freedom from Your Freedom

So you’ve faced your inner most fears and liberated yourself from them. Now what? Maybe, like

myself, you’ve stepped out into the bright, beautiful world, smiled at the birds, breathed in the new air at your renewed sense of self…only to find that being liberated and free is kind of, well BORING.

I mean sure, it’s kind of nice not carrying around all that emotional baggage, but be honest, don’t you kind of miss the drama, the electrifying feeling that comes with intense negativity? It’s like that intense, hair-raising feeling that comes just before getting struck by lightning. Sure the lightning itself hurts, but leading up to it? Man, what a feeling!

Say, for example, you’ve recently recovered from binge eating. You discovered, after much soul searching, that you were using food as a way to fill the empty parts of your soul. Now that you’ve healed the hole in your heart, what incentive do you have to continue eating? Well, I can give you an incentive: the objective fact that that brownie over there is delicious. Mmmm… brownies.

Oh, excuse me for that. I kind of spaced out there. My point is, even if your emotional wounds have

This picture is supposed to represent panic. Look how interesting it is!

This picture is supposed to represent panic. Look how interesting it is!

healed, why not pretend they haven’t for a little bit, you know, just for kicks? Panic is fun, because – Look out! GIANT SPIDER!

See? Come on, you know you enjoyed that. The other thing about freedom that’s kind of irritating is that it takes a lot of work. Sure, you could go out and connect with others and have a life, or you could stay indoors, play video games and watch other people succeed at life for you on T.V. Now which sounds like more fun? If you said “Living your life,” then you’ve never played Minecraft. So email me your “success and then failed again” stories. I’ll pick a personal winner and that person will receive absolutely nothing!

Until next time, enjoy your panic.